I remember I was 20 years old when I started to preach in churches, schools, and youth camps. The day I started to witness God’s provision to fulfill the calling He puts in my heart.
It was 8 years ago, but I could still imagine the feeling I had that day. I’m an introvert person. Standing in front of the crowd, being the centre of people’s attention isn’t my cup of tea. I was shaking, my voice was trembling, yet I stood up with confident He gave me. Thought I struggled within myself, I enjoyed the time when I deliver God’s word to others. God puts this desire in me and He helps me to overcome my weaknesses. My journey to witnessing His’ works has begun on that day!
God-given calling planted in my heart. I carry it wherever I go. Share Jesus with the youth is one of what I’m passionate about. Nothing change. The things that have changed are the situations, circumstances, and challenges around me. Yes, they are always changing, aren’t they?
My work was easier when I stayed in Jakarta, or when I was with YWAM Philippines. People around me were those who are passionate about serving the Lord and reach people. Those who have the same calling and willing to work for His glory. Those who can encourage me when I feel weak. Those who can rebuke me when I did something wrong.
Nowadays, I’m far away from them. I look around and I feel I’m all alone. I’m living in the unfamiliar land, and I’ve been doing, exactly, the very different things in this place. Sharing life with special needs people. Supporting them in daily routines and works. Inside the house and at the workplace. Totally different from my previous ministry!
While doing my voluntary work here, I’m holding the calling tight. And recently, I’m afraid if my calling gets blurred.
‘Why am I here? Is it necessary?’ My heart once was troubled. “Am I in the right place to do His calling?” Myself was doubting if it’s the right place for me to do His will.
Sometimes, we won’t get ‘YES’ or ‘NO’ straight away for the question we threw to heaven. But I could learn the lesson: when we pursue God’s heart, we will surely gain more faith in Him. And faith helps me to see my circumstances in a better way. Here is what faith says to me…
You are serving God who provides. He calls and equips. He provides provision to carry out the vision. You are in the right place when You clearly see His provision!
As I started working in this place, I started to consider learning Music Therapy as one of my next steps. And I started thinking of funding. When I was struggling with this, God sent me a generous lady who wants to help me financially. I have not met this lady in person yet. Apart from her name ‘Anna’, the only thing I have heard about her is that she gives funding and scholarship for some students. Is it for real, God? Yes, it is. I just need to prepare myself to enter university next year. Yes, God provides!!
Another evidence of His provision in this place is one of my good friends have bought me instruments. Since I met him over six months ago, I’ve been so blessed. Couple weeks ago, I had my weekend off and he invited me to London. He took me to Yamaha Music London and bought me instruments.
God’s provision! To be honest I have no clue why GOD brought me here and let me do exactly a very different ministry as I used to do. But I’ve been witnessing His providence during my work here, and it should help me to walk with confidence. Yes, I’m in the right place. I’m stepping in faith to carry out the vision, knowing that God will remain faithful. He calls, enables, provides, and equips!